What Would The World Be Like If These People Replaced David Letterman?

Fatimah Mazhar
What if one of these people was chosen to do The Late Show?

One of the greatest late-night show hosts ever, David Letterman, announced his retirement on Thursday from "The Late Show” of which he was a part for almost 21 years.

The 66-year-old left much speculation behind about who might succeed him on CBS opposite rival network NBC's top-rated "The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon."

Within hours of the important announcement by Letterman, the blogosphere started rolling with ideas as to who would be the ideal choice to replace the legendary late night host.

While many consider Craig Ferguson of the Late Late Show as the natural heir to Letterman’s throne, (because his show comes right after the Late Show on CBS) many think the network would aim for someone who could give Fallon a hard time with ratings.

The mainstream media in general thinks accomplished funnymen like Jimmy Kimmel, Conan O’Brien or Stephen Colbert would prove to be the most ideal successors for Letterman.

However, people like the ones mentioned below could also potentially bring high – or even higher – ratings if given the chance to host the most iconic of late-night gigs.

Why? Well that’s because all of these people are annoyingly funny and refuse to admit it – which actually makes it more hilarious.

So here’s a list of the most unusual, unwanted and unorthodox contenders for Late Show With David Letterman.

Lo and behold!

Alec Baldwin:

Alec Baldwin's late-night talk show "Up Late with Alec Baldwin" on MSNBC was canceled last year in November over him verbally assaulting a New York photographer. The assault was described by a gay rights group as homophobic in nature.

He is not really funny as such but his vendetta against paparazzi and former employer’s employees such as Rachel Maddow often provides comic relief.

Sarah Palin:

Former Governor of Alaska and the queen of political incorrectness Sarah Palin already has a resume full of television hosting on different networks. Her off-the-wall views and controversy-generating satire are more than capable of garnering higher ratings than Jimmy Fallon.

Only, CBS would want to hire someone after two months because Palin has this habit of getting kicked off for saying stuff on air that she probably should not.

For example, during a speech for the promotion of her book “Good Tidings and Great Joy: Protecting the Heart of Christmas”, the former Alaska governor said that federal debt from China would eventually enslave Americans, adding that she wasn’t trying to be racist – at all.

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Bill O Reilly:

Bill O’Reilly is probably the best odd choice for Letterman’s replacement because his views on the O’Reilly Factor are equally funny – only his are stupid, genuinely stupid.

For example, when the United States was planning to bomb Syria last year, the White House claimed it would be on an extremely small scale.

O’Reilly thought he was being funny when he said whether ‘unbelievably small’ strike in Syria meant the U.S. was going to bomb midgets.

Also, Obama won’t likely appear on The Late Show if O’Reilly hosting.

Piers Morgan:

Like Baldwin, Piers Morgan too is no longer the host of a television show. His prime time show on CNN was canceled abruptly in March due to poor ratings.

Since his political views – especially the ones about gun control laws – are generally not welcome in America, he should probably try his luck with humor.

Also, he knows how to handle the pressure of a good show. “Piers Morgan Live” replaced “Larry King Live” which was the most watched and longest-running program on CNN.

Pat Robertson:

He is probably the funniest of the lot.

Pat Robertson’s views on women, gays and Muslims no longer seem offensive because people have now come to the conclusion that whatever this man says or claims doesn’t really count because it’s all brainless and thoroughly unintelligent. 

For example, the octogenarian televangelist is of the opinion that there is no global warming because the winters are actually getting colder every year. He suggested the planet was instead undergoing global “cooling” and that all the scientists of the world were just idiots spending time and wasting money researching on climate change.


So who’s your pick?  Who do you think would be the oddest and the most illogical replacement for David Letterman?

You can share your answers in the comments section below.