Modern Family’s Sofia Vergara opens up about family tragedies and how she’s weathered the tough times in this Sunday’s PARADE with Dotson Rader. In the exclusive extras below, the 39-year-old star shares her thoughts on love and relationships and gives her take on American vs. Latin men (it’s all in the dance moves!)
[Online editor's note: Be sure to check out this weekend's issue of PARADE magazine in the San Angelo Standard-Times for the full interview with Sofia Vergara.
On American vs. Latin men.
“Do you know the difference between American men and Latin men? American men don’t dance. And one of the things I like about my boyfriend [Nick Loeb] is that he tries. He'll go out there with me and do his moves. He is not the best dancer, but he is not afraid, and that is very charming.
“American men are not taught to dance by their mothers. It's so odd. When my son was young I would put music on at home and say, ‘Manolo, we're going to dance.’ He'd say, ‘Why? I don't want to!’ I’d say, ‘No? Come, Manolo, we're going to dance.’ And I would hold him and teach him. Now he's a great dancer. I know that he secretly thanks me for that because he's the only one that has the girls dancing at all the parties.
Her son, 19, heads for college this fall following his graduation from an elite New England boarding school.
“He's been in the United States since he was three. He talks perfect English, perfect Spanish. He’s very American and very Colombian, too. He dances like a Colombian; he drinks like a Colombian; and every six months he goes to Colombia to visit his father [José Gonzàlez, whom Vergara divorced amicably after two years]. I encourage that, of course. They’re very close. He’s in Miami right now, where most of my family live.
“I never want something that I do as an actress to hurt him. But fame is something that I cannot control, and I have accepted it. It's my job. It's my work. It's the way that I support him and give my family everything. I always tell him to be good. Why take risks? Try to be the best that you can be—at least make the effort. Be intelligent. There's always the chance people may try to criticize you, but if you're doing nothing wrong, there's nothing to criticize.”
Although she’s been romantically linked over the years with the likes of Enrique Iglesias, Tom Cruise, and Mark Wahlberg, she never remarried.
“I’ve loved my boyfriends, and then love changes, and I don't know why. If I had the answer, I'd write a book and be a billionaire! As human beings, we change with what happens to us. Our feelings change. How many people are so lucky that they find the complete, perfect combination in someone? I know that some people have, but it's difficult.
“Also, occasionally people get bored. Some people need lots of things going on in their lives, and just having someone who wakes up next to you and is always there isn’t enough. You wonder why. Maybe never being bored is the key to a relationship? Who knows what the secret is.
“Maybe people who become famous have insecurities about being loved and they don't know how to deal with them. Is it me that they want, or is it my fame or money, or is it my beauty or whatever? Maybe they don't really love me? I think that's why so many famous people end up
on the drugs and alcohol.
“You should take fame and other things and see them as part of your life. Why is it wrong that someone wants you because of beauty or talent? I don’t see that as bad. It is part of who you are. I guess that's why I've never really had the insecurity of asking myself, 'Do they really love me or want me because of my body?' I'm sure many men have wanted me first for the body. But I know from having a relationship with those guys that I have so much more to offer, and I know that afterwards they're the ones begging me to stay. So there's something much more than beauty involved.”
On that famous body.
“I've been very lucky that I've never had cellulite. My body was always firm. In Latin America, women are supposed to be voluptuous. They don't believe that you have to be skinny to be attractive.”
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