Love is hard. And as we grow older, singles who have to experience the havoc of a dating life realize just how hard it is to meet that special someone. Meeting the wrong person happens more and more, which results in an inevitable parting of ways.
In a recent Reddit thread, the Internet was asked “what is the most George Constanza-esque reason you broke up with someone?” George from the popular '90s sitcom Seinfeld was perhaps the most unlucky man in love. He probably had a lot to do with the line “it’s not me, it’s you,” which is ironic because anyone could easily pick up what all his failed relationships had in common (him).
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Here is a list of the most bizarre break-ups that came up from the thread:
1) This guy knows exactly what he wants – or doesn’t want.
“She was allergic to peanut butter. Like really bad. If I was gonna see her I couldn't have peanut butter for the two days before. That's a life I don't want to live.”
2) Well, this guy certainly knew how to give her what she wanted:
"She said ‘don't break up with me today, I'm wearing eye make up.’ The day after, she wore none, so I broke up with her.”
3) This guy really wanted to spice things up, but his date couldn’t take it:
nutcase girl just broke up with me because I took her out for dinner too much. She felt I was trying to sabotage her diet.”
4) This guy had the strangest reason for breaking up:
"She had a smell. It wasn't a bad smell. It was quite pleasant. Everyone likes her smell. I hated that. I only date women that don't have any smell at all now.”
5) Beware of serial fork stabbers, as this guy clearly came across one of those.
"She held her fork overhanded, as in the shovel technique. You can't take someone like that anywhere.”
6) Apparently, many people are aware of this and would best like to avoid it:
"She walked like a T. Rex."
7) This seems valid enough.
"I Had A Friend Who Broke Things Off With A Girl Because She Would Type And Text The Way I'm Writing This Right Now.”
8) Unfortunately, this guy knows his Seinfeld:
"She walked too slow. We'd go out somewhere and walk down the street and I'd turn around and she's like 20 feet behind me.”
9) Timing. Timing is everything. Also, fear of a 34-day commitment is a real thing:
"It was 4 days before my birthday and she said she was going to get me a gift. I knew I couldn't break up with her for at least 30 days after accepting her gift and I wasn't willing to make a 34 day commitment to the relationship.”
10) By George, she’s GOT it!
"I'll give you the most George Constanza reason I dated someone: his old girlfriend died in a plane crash. My worst nightmare is dying in a plane crash. I figured the universe wouldn't allow two of his girlfriends to die in such a way. I am such a small human person.”
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