German Man Buys 38,000 Menthol Cigarettes In Fear They Will Be Banned

From the time he spent as German Chancellor till today, Schmidt has never let government decision, or “laws” as some people call them deter him from smoking whenever, and wherever he pleased.

Schmidt, Menthol ciggarette

 

A 94-year-old German man, and former chancellor of the country fears that menthol cigarettes may soon be banned by the European Union. To protect himself in the case of this grizzly reality, Helmut Schmidt has spent the past few years buying and hoarding 38,000 menthol cigarettes in his home.

From the time he spent as German Chancellor till today, Schmidt has never let government decision, or “laws” as some people call them deter him from smoking whenever, and wherever he pleased. Schmidt is most known in German politics for his will to smoke at political conventions, at public hearings, and wherever the hell else he felt like it.

Now, as the European Union seems closer than ever to banning the sale of Menthol cigarettes, Schmidt has again taken actions to ensure his right to smoke will not be impeded on. The 38,000 cigarettes Schmidt has bought from a number of different locations will provide him a pack a day until he is 100.

First, congratulations to Mr. Schmidt on his longevity considering his obvious fandom of tobacco. If lung cancer hasn’t caught him so far, there is no reason to believe it ever will. Schmidt loves to smoke, and you have to respect a man who follows his passion.

Isn’t Helmut Schmidt everything Americans love and expect from Germans? Here is a no-nonsense man who will not be told what to do. I bet Schmidt shoots kids that won’t get off his lawn with rock salt too. What a man.

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