Man Narrowly Misses Neighbor While Taking Out A Zombie

The arguments for gun control keep piling up.

An unhealthy obsession with apocalyptic narratives, and unregulated availability of weapons makes for a lethal combination, as America continues to find out.

Ryan Matther

A North St. Paul man was apparently ‘protecting’ his neighborhood when he nearly shot a neighbor sleeping in his own house. At the intersection of Memory Lane and Cowarn Place East, 24-year-old Ryan Matthew Stanislaw spotted a ‘zombie’ up the road. He took aim, determined to take this one down. The bullet instead shattered a neighbor’s window, ricocheted near the head of a man’s bed, and struck a wall.


The police were called to the scene at around 5 in the morning. They found Ryan with an AR-15 rifle slung over his shoulder. The man reeked of alcohol and was adamant that he decided to finish this threat to his neighborhood when he did not see any cops around. The ammunition Stanislaw used was manufactured especially to target zombies. This obviously means that stories of zombies had already been cooking in Ryan’s mind before this incident, and he had been preparing for any dangerous situation.

The complaint lodged against Stanislaw notes that he was convicted in Ramsey County of making terrorist threats last month. Although he very clearly needs help, Stanislaw’s mother has vehemently denied any history of him having mental disorders.

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