Stop everything: A male marine held an umbrella for President Obama. What, you don't realize that this is a scandal? Well, let the Daily Caller explain:
According to Marine Corps regulation MCO P1020.34F of the Marine Corps Uniform Regulations chapter 3, a male Marine is not allowed to carry an umbrella while in uniform. There is no provision in the Marine Corps uniform regulation guidelines that allows a male Marine to carry an umbrella.
The relevant portion of the regulation reads, “3035. UMBRELLAS (Female Marines). Female Marines may carry an all-black, plain standard or collapsible umbrella at their option during inclement weather with the service and dress uniforms. It will be carried in the left hand so that the hand salute can be properly rendered. Umbrellas may not be used/carried in formation nor will they be carried with the utility uniform.”
So, to sum up, marines have a randomly sexist umbrella carrying policy, Obama allowed said policy to be violated (does the PRESIDENT not KNOW the GENDER-SPECIFIC MARINE UMBRELLA CARRYING POLICY?) while at a Press Conference with a Turkish Prime Minister. Because, you know, no one would care or make a big deal out of it if Obama had the male marine switched out for a female umbrella-carrying marine.
Obama allegedly threatened to double the umbrella scandal by offering the Prime Minister of Turkey an umbrella as well.
The breach in gendered umbrella protocol did not go unnoticed by the right:
Umbrella-gate, is, of course, in Sarah Palin's wheelhouse. Remember when she was the GOP candidate for Vice-President? That was really weird.
Scandalous Hat TrickMr. President, when it rains it pours, but most Americans hold their own umbrellas. Today in... fb.me/zAZryzjj— Sarah Palin (@SarahPalinUSA) May 17, 2013
Palin's tweet proved to be inconveniently timed with this picture posted by the Washington Post (IMAGE: Twitter):
Liberal tweeters enjoyed themselves immensely with this story:
Dems: How dare Pres. Bush start an illegal war! GOP: How dare Pres. Obama have an umbrella! Media: These two, they're always fighting.— Justin Reedy (@justinsreedy) May 17, 2013
I was ok with extrajudicial assassinations, guantanamo bay, arrests of medical marijuana patients, but this umbrella thing... damn— tinybaby (@tinybaby) May 17, 2013
Daily Caller working on explosiveDallas/JFK second umbrella theory— TBogg (@tbogg) May 17, 2013
There is actual news, real issues, important debates out there, but don't worry about those. Worry about the fact that the President had a male marine hold an umbrella for him.