Whether you swoon or spit at President Obama's every word, everyone can have their State of the Union Address watching experience enhanced by a good drinking game. I recommend beer, maybe wine for this--if you use liquor you will be sloshed by "The state of the union is ___." Now, without further ado, your 2013 State of the Union Address drinking game:
When President Obama says, "the state of the union is..."
"Strong": Big sip
"Sound": Small sip
Anything over eight letters: Big sip
If Obama DOESN'T start with "the state of the union is...": Gulp
Every time all the Democrats and none of the Republicans give a standing ovation: Big sip.
"Win the future": Big sip
"China": Small sip
"Republicans and Democrats" (he has to emphasive "and" but the order of "Republicans" and "Democrats" doesn't matter): Small sip
Any anecdote about someone Obama met who would benefit from the policy he is advocating: Big sip
"Immigration" "Climate Change" or "Afghanistan": Small sip
"Standing in line" (probably in reference to people voting, but regardless): Big sip
"Assault weapons": Gulp
"On the eve...": Small sip
"Math and science": Big sip
"Staple a green card to their passport": Big sip
"That's not the America...": Big sip
Any time the camera pans to a Republican making a hilariously disgruntled face or mouthing something contrarian: Gulp.
If it's a Supreme Court Justice: Double gulp.
John Boehner cries: Gulp.
When you are sure you have just seen the most random State of the Union guest in the audience: Big sip.
When that gets topped: Gulp.
Ted Nugent (yes, he'll be there) makes his presence known in any way: Finish your drink immediately.