President Obama will deliver his sixth State of the Union Address on Tuesday, 9pm EST. PHOTO: Wikimedia Commons
Whether you swoon or spit at President Obama's every word, everyone can have their State of the Union Address watching experience enhanced by a good drinking game. Remember to swig responsibly, and no shame in taking a break if every line gets a standing ovation from the left and no ovation from the right (big sip is called for there).
Now, without further ado, your 2014 State of the Union Address drinking game:
When President Obama says, "the state of the union is..."
"Strong": Big sip
"Sound": Small sip
Anything over eight letters: Big sip
If Obama DOESN'T start with "the state of the union is...": Gulp
Every time all the Democrats and none of the Republicans give a standing ovation: Big sip.
"China": Small sip
"Republicans and Democrats" (he has to emphasive "and" but the order of "Republicans" and "Democrats" doesn't matter): Small sip
Any anecdote about someone Obama met who would benefit from the policy he is advocating: Big sip
Any anecdote about a high-achieving undocumented immigrant: Gulp
"Immigration" "Climate Change" or "Minimum Wage": Small sip
“Syria”: Big sip the first time, small ones from there on out.
References Edward Snowden without saying his name: Small sip
“Edward Snowden”: Big sip
"Drone Strikes": Small sip
"Math and science": Small sip
"Staple a green card to their passport": Big sip
"That's not the America...": Big sip
Any time the camera pans to a Republican making a hilariously disgruntled face or mouthing something contrarian: Gulp.
If it's a Supreme Court Justice: Double gulp.
Camera shows Mayor Sokolich of Fort Lee (at the center of the New Jersey bridge scandal): Big sip.
John Boehner cries: Gulp.
When you are sure you have just seen the most random State of the Union guest in the audience: Big sip.
When that gets topped: Gulp.
Bonus Round! The Three State of the Union Responses
Official Republican Party State of the Union response by Rep. Cathy McMorris Rodgers (R-Wash.)
Anytime the anchors on whatever station you are watching explain who Rep. Rodgers is: Small sip.
“Job-killing policies”: Small sip
Any reference to the Chamber of Commerce or Heritage Foundation: Big sip
“Obamacare”: Small sip
Tea Party Response By Sen. Mike Lee (R-Utah)
“Small government”: Small sip
“Government overreach”: Big sip
“Repeal and replace Obamacare”: Gulp
Rand Paul (R-Ky.) Response Representing No One In Particular
“American values”: Small sip
“President Obama has failed”: Big sip
“I am running for president”: Finish drink immediately