President Obama will deliver his sixth State of the Union Address on Tuesday, 9pm EST.
Whether you swoon or spit at President Obama's every word, everyone can have their State of the Union Address watching experience enhanced by a good drinking game. Remember to swig responsibly, and no shame in taking a break if every line gets a standing ovation from the left and no ovation from the right (big sip is called for there).
Now, without further ado, your 2014 State of the Union Address drinking game:
When President Obama says, "the state of the union is..."
"Strong": Big sip
"Sound": Small sip
Anything over eight letters: Big sip
If Obama DOESN'T start with "the state of the union is...": Gulp
Every time all the Democrats and none of the Republicans give a standing ovation: Big sip.
"China": Small sip
"Republicans and Democrats" (he has to emphasive "and" but the order of "Republicans" and "Democrats" doesn't matter): Small sip
Any anecdote about someone Obama met who would benefit from the policy he is advocating: Big sip
Any anecdote about a high-achieving undocumented immigrant: Gulp
"Immigration" "Climate Change" or "Minimum Wage": Small sip
“Syria”: Big sip the first time, small ones from there on out.
References Edward Snowden without saying his name: Small sip
“Edward Snowden”: Big sip
"Drone Strikes": Small sip
"Math and science": Small sip
"Staple a green card to their passport": Big sip
"That's not the America...": Big sip
Any time the camera pans to a Republican making a hilariously disgruntled face or mouthing something contrarian: Gulp.
If it's a Supreme Court Justice: Double gulp.
Camera shows Mayor Sokolich of Fort Lee (at the center of the New Jersey bridge scandal): Big sip.
John Boehner cries: Gulp.
When you are sure you have just seen the most random State of the Union guest in the audience: Big sip.
When that gets topped: Gulp.
Bonus Round! The Three State of the Union Responses
Official Republican Party State of the Union response by Rep. Cathy McMorris Rodgers (R-Wash.)
Anytime the anchors on whatever station you are watching explain who Rep. Rodgers is: Small sip.
“Job-killing policies”: Small sip
Any reference to the Chamber of Commerce or Heritage Foundation: Big sip
“Obamacare”: Small sip
Tea Party Response By Sen. Mike Lee (R-Utah)
“Small government”: Small sip
“Government overreach”: Big sip
“Repeal and replace Obamacare”: Gulp
Rand Paul (R-Ky.) Response Representing No One In Particular
“American values”: Small sip
“President Obama has failed”: Big sip
“I am running for president”: Finish drink immediately