Luis Suarez, who delivered a shoulder bite seen 'round the world at the World Cup, received the harshest punishment FIFA has ever handed down.
Suarez is banned from nine international matches and four months of FIFA soccer, sanctions that not only leave Uruguay without the biter for the remainder of the World Cup, but also extend to the English Premier league.
Debate is already raging about the punishment -- "too litte!" say those who note he's a repeat offender for biting. "Too much!" say those who question whether biting is worse than head-butting -- but it's fairly appalling that this 27-year-old hasn't outgrown behavior a toddler knows is wrong.
Instead of fighting, let's all just enjoy the Internet doing what it does best: a Twitter hashtag explosion of #ThingsSuarezCantDo. Some of these are pure gold.
#ThingsSuarezCantDo send Chiellini a friend request— UK Banter (@UKBanter) June 26, 2014
#ThingsSuarezCantDo eat at Tratoria Milano in our departure lounge...— Manchester Airport (@manairport) June 26, 2014
#ThingsSuarezCantDo Keep his teeth onside.— JUST-EAT.co.uk (@JustEatUK) June 26, 2014
#ThingsSuarezCantDo Get a second date. Keep a dentist for more than six months. Play football like a grown up.— Will Black (@WillBlackWriter) June 26, 2014
If you need a reminder why people are so upset at Suarez's conduct, it's because it's nothing new. Presenting his most ridiculous moments, even before this bite: