5 Halloween Costumes That Will Ruin Your Childhood

You'll never look at 'Sesame Street' the same way again.

"Halloween is the one night a year when a girl can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it."

Those immortal words from Lindsay Lohan in "Mean Girls" barely do justice to the abundance of "sexy" Halloween costumes out there. Take the hopes and dreams of any child—"I want to be a cop when I grow up!" "I want to be a doctor!"—add in a low cut shirt and short shorts, and you have a ridiculous Halloween costume.

But surely, we naively thought, some things are sacred. Some things are just never meant to be sexified for Halloween. Fine, be a sexy nurse. But Big Bird—he has to be safe! 

How wrong we were; these five "sexy" Halloween costumes will essentially ruin your idyllic, innocent childhood memories.

Sesame Street Walkers

This comes courtesy of Yandy, whose director of marketing said

"It's fun for women to dress up as characters, albeit scantily clad characters, that they can't dress up as in normal life ... Why some people get so up in arms because the sexy costume a woman chose to wear out for a night of carefree fun, which generally covers more than a standard bikini mind you, is beyond us."

Look, ladies, you do you. Just leave Bert and Ernie out of it.

My Plumber Doesn't Wear This

Why go for the expected sexy Princess Peach costume, when you can be Super Mario and Luigi in stilettos? It must be hard to unclog pipes in those heels.

Risque Fairy Tales

My grandmother, what big eyes you have. Even Little Red Riding Hood gets the sexy Halloween treatment. She and Belle are just two of the fairy tales you can turn into softcore porn for Halloween.

Adult Disney

Some Disney costumes frankly lend themselves to a sexy Halloween bent: Tinkerbell, anyone? But Yandy is back again, proving any character, from Jesse in "Toy Story 2" to Alice in Wonderland, can be transformed into an adult Halloween ensemble.

No, No, No!

But nothing compares to this. Many a fan has co-opted "Frozen" for parody songs or adorable toddlers belting out "Let It Go." But poor Olaf. We bet he likes warm hugs, though.

View Comments

Recommended For You