The account that goes by the handle of “Tweet Of God” is a brilliant parody of how the almighty would – or most probably would not – communicate with his most loved and hated creation; human beings.
The hilarious thread is full of acerbic wit as well as sarcastic and narcissistic comments. It boasts over 1.2 million followers and you wonder if it is being run by a comic genius who can give a voice to the twisted thoughts and doubts you sometimes have regarding God.
Well, the account is indeed being run by someone who has a lot of experience making the world laugh through his writings.
Dave Javerbaum, the former head writer on “The Daily Show With Jon Stewart”, is the mastermind behind popular Twitter account @TheTweetOfGod. The veteran humorist received 11 Emmy Awards while working for Comedy Central’s popular late-night satirical show.
He has also written a book The Last Testament: A Memoir By God, which basically inspired the parody account.
We’ll now have a look at some of the most creative tweets from God that will not only tickle your neurons but also push some sense into you.
1. So are you one of those people who think blaming others for your problems is easy?
It’s easy to blame other people for your problems, so do that.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) April 23, 2014
2. Practicing vs. preaching:
Practice what you preach. Better yet, don't preach.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) April 22, 2014
3. People who aspire to “change” the world
If you want to change the world you're gonna need a big diaper.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) February 9, 2014
4. When you thing God has started talking to you:
When I start talking to you, you should start talking to a psychiatrist.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) April 6, 2014
5. On climate change:
YOU ARE DESTROYING YOUR PLANET. Sorry for the all caps. But soon you will have no caps.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) April 1, 2014
6. What you can do for world peace – and for yourself
Stop focusing on tiny made-up reasons to kill each other and start focusing on the enormous actual things that will kill all of you.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) February 19, 2014
7. Don’t stop believing:
Sometimes, if you believe in something hard enough and deeply enough, nothing happens.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) March 12, 2014
8. Remember the 10 New Commandments
THE NEW 10 COMMANDMENTS 1 Laugh. 2 Read. 3 Say please. 4 Floss. 5 Doubt. 6 Exercise. 7 Learn. 8 Don't hate. 9 Cut the bullshit. 10 Chill.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) April 20, 2014
9. Here’s how you should deal with grumpy people
The easily offended deserve to be easily offended.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) March 12, 2014
10. Do not be embarrassed of your confessions to God:
You never have to worry about being embarrassed or ashamed to tell Me anything, because I'm not listening anyway.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) February 21, 2014
11. On Grammar
The main prerequisite for admission to heaven is proper grammar.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) February 17, 2014
12. How to deal with your problems:
If you're going to throw someone under the bus, make sure it's moving.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) January 31, 2014
13. On killing dolphins:
Don't slaughter dolphins you sick awful motherfuckers. #tweet4taiji— God (@TheTweetOfGod) January 19, 2014
14. Stand up for what you believe in:
Always stand up for what you believe in, unless what you believe in is stupid.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) November 6, 2013
15. What can be better for you than free will:
Free will is good, but free pizza is better.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) October 19, 2013